


Painted Skin

by m0rph3us



Category: Naruto
Genre: Academy Arc, All kinds of messed-up, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Baby Badasses, Blood and Blood and More Blood, Bullying, Childhood, Dreams and Nightmares, Eventual Mental Health Issues, Everyone Might Just be Crazy or Insane, Flashbacks, Fluffy pets, Gen, Getting to Know Each Other, Haruno Sakura-centric, Historical Changes in Naruto, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Konoha Elders are the worst, Like Way Way Back, Masking, Mentions of betrayal, Mysteries will be resolved someday - maybe, Naruto and Sakura are childhood friends, Non Uchiha Massacre (sort of), Obsessive Behavior, Okojo, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Power can corrupt, Psychopathic Tendencies, Puppies, ROOT ANBU, Sakura Haruno and Taxidermy, Slight Gore and Horror, Slight fluff and angst, Slight yandere vibes, Slightly slow burn story, Sort of multiple personality disorder, Stoats are wild but cute, Timeskip, Yandere Haruno Sakura, and, and Past Clan Massacre, haruno is a clan, slight child neglect
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 02:21:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29110710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m0rph3us/pseuds/m0rph3us
Summary: Konohagakure is peace and camaraderie and all about protecting the Will of Fire. Yet in Konoha, there is darkness that festers at her roots and the person who is supposed to protect her does not make any move. There are secrets too shameful to be revealed and names whose existence has been erased. There is a plot unfurling and a storm about to turn the Shinobi world upside down.And in the middle of it all is a roseate child whose vivid green eyes hide layers upon layers of secrecy and complexity that should not be present in a civilian child as she.But Haruno Sakura is no civilian. She is also no shinobi, not yet. But she is a Haruno and she has been brought up to be the linchpin for Konoha. Even if no one knows it yet.(Introduction Arc -  1st part of the Hyohi Series)
Relationships: Haruno Kizashi & Haruno Mebuki & Haruno Sakura, Haruno Sakura & Hyuuga Hinata, Haruno Sakura & Original Character(s), Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Itachi, Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Shisui, Haruno Sakura & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Yamanaka Ino, Hyuuga Hinata & Uzumaki Naruto, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, Sarutobi Hiruzen & Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 26
Kudos: 163





	1. Birthday Present

**Author's Note:**

> A product of insomnia, coffee and stiff necks paired with my already messed up brain that suddenly had a spark of creative juice and inspiration after so long.
> 
> (Edit: I changed the summary just to make it fit closer to the way this story is gonna go. Especially since I made a choice to cut the story into 'series')

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She is four years old, smiling and innocent as she watched her mama unwrap her gift until she no longer is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight and implicit gore. Maybe a little bit of child abuse if you squint?

It was supposed to be a happy day. 

Nothing at all ever indicated that today was going to be anything but a happy day. The sun was shining bright but not too hot that it burned. There were just enough clouds to provide shade but not enough to be considered as overcast. There was a light breeze and the usual sound of chirping birds and squeals of kittens and cubs. The smell of the freshly sprouted greens and trees as the world slowly awoke from its slumber was like perfume that wafted through the air. The laughter of children and usual greeting exchanged by adults echoed slightly throughout the whole district. 

Everything from the first light of dawn until the sun had fully emerged, waking up the world, indicated that it was going to be a happy day. 

Except it was anything but a happy day.

The sound of retching and muffled sobs echoed loudly inside the windowless room that was made with white walls and illuminated brightly by a pearl-like orb. The smell of rust and copper mixed with vomit and antiseptic, slowly filled the rather empty room save for a slightly slanted metal table with raised edges where a suspiciously looking human-shaped lump of bones and muscle was laid uncovered. Attached to the table were several faucets and drains with a cabinet underneath it that hid the large pipe that connected the table drain to the outside. An open surgical case cart filled with trays of different surgical equipment stained with blood and flesh was beside the table. Another cart was beside it that had two basins, one filled with bloody water and the other, slightly overflowing with what seemed to be stripped skin, muscle and a few unrecognizable human organs. A discarded pair of gloves could be seen beside the basin alongside a few bloody rags.

A woman with short peach-colored hair wearing a bloodstained white lab coat approached the source of sobbing and retching sounds. She removed the string of the mask that hung on the right side of her ear, letting it dangle beside her face. She watched indifferently at the ugly sight the pink-haired child made in front of her.

“M-mama.” The woman clicked her tongue and irritation colored her face for a second before it morphed back to indifference. She grabbed the shoulders of the child and forced her to look at her, pinching the soft chin of the child so tightly that it would leave bruises that would not fade for weeks.

“What did I say about addressing me while inside this room?” 

The child shivered slightly, tears and snot flowing down her already pale face. The woman tightened her grip until the child groaned in pain. Her eyes darkened considerably. Seeing this, the child squirmed even more before she stopped her futile attempt of escaping the tight grip that forced her to stay when the woman’s fingernail dug at the soft skin of her chin, breaking past the skin slightly. 

“What did I say about addressing me while inside this room?” 

The child’s tears were still flowing and mixed with the small amount of blood that trickled from the small cut on her soft chin. She sniffled and shivered, either in fear or pain, the woman wasn’t sure. It wasn't as if she really cared that much in the first place, anyway.

After a few seconds, the child opened her small mouth and addressed the woman in front of her. Despite how steady her childish voice sounded, there was a mixture of heartbreak and confusion at the end.

“Momoshi-sensei…” 

The woman’s indifferent expression broke as a small and gentle smile plastered itself on her face. She removed her grip on the child's delicate chin and grabbed a white handkerchief from inside her coat’s inner pockets. Almost as if she was not the same person who caused the bruise and the cut, she delicately and reverently wiped away any trace of tear stain, snot and blood away from the child’s pale face.

“That's better. Remember what I always tell you and you won't get hurt, okay? I like good girls the best, and you're a good girl, aren't you?” 

"Yes. I'm a good girl, I promise."

Momoshi's smile brightened even more and patted the child's head softly as if she was incapable of pain. When she saw the child was considerably calmer, she lowered her body just a bit so that she was looking straight into the child's vibrant green eyes. She reached both hands out in front and her eyes narrowed with her smile.

"Now, let's get back to what we were doing."

The child remained silent, her small hands gripping the edges of her gray shirt that was far too long for her. There was fear and trepidation in her vivid green eyes as her gaze went past Momoshi and lingered on the mess of flesh and bones there. She wanted to shake her head but the fear that in the end it would be her who would be lying on that cold, sterile and metallic slab made her bow her head instead.

"Would you like me to carry you?"

Seeing no reply from the child, Momoshi took matters into her own hands and lifted the child's small body into her embrace. Her small arms wrapped around Momoshi's neck and the child settled the still pale face onto the crook of her neck. She could feel the child's form shivering and a frown marred her face. Walking back to the table, she grabbed the small metallic stool with her free hand and dragged it closer to the table. Patting the child in her arms lightly, she settled her onto the top of the stool and lightly nudged her to leave her embrace. She could feel hesitation in the child’s movements and made a mental note to work on that as soon as she can. Hesitation was an emotion that was far too costly to be invested in. 

“Turn around.”

The child did so, and she watched as her already pale face turned a shade paler that she could see the veins on her face and neck too clearly. She removed her hold on the child's body and grabbed a pair of clean gloves. Putting it on, she began to systematically move the lump of flesh on the table. The sound of squishing and squelching with the occasional sound of bone hitting metal echoed throughout the room. After she had finished rearranging the lump into something far more recognizable, she turned towards the child and smiled.

“Now, let’s continue unwrapping your present, shall we?”

There was a short few seconds of silence before a small and shaky voice answered.

“Y-yes, Momoshi-sensei.” 

She smiled, pleased at the positive response she had received. At the rate they were going, they would be done just before lunch time. She grabbed the skull that was placed at the top end of the table and moved it close enough so that Sakura could look at it.

“Very good. Now, this bone I’m holding in my hands right now is called a skull. It is a bony structure that supports the face and forms a protective cavity for the brain. It is composed of many bones, which are formed by intramembranous ossification, and joined by sutures. Now, your present is found in here and we're going to get it out in a while. But first, let's finish up with these. The organ I'm holding on to now is called the liver..."

The sound of Momoshi’s voice as she resumed her lecture on the different parts of the human body reverberated throughout the enclosed white room. The smell of rust and copper was thick enough to cover the scent of fear that the small child exuded while standing with shaky legs atop the metal stool. 

When they finally reached the end of the lesson, nothing but a single sphenoid bone delicately laid atop a clean towel was left of the body that had been laid down on the table earlier.

Momoshi’s serious and indifferent expression changed, morphing back to the gentle and loving expression that the child was used to. She had removed her bloodstained lab coat, her mask and gloves leaving behind a powder-blue colored dress that reached her knees that was spotless. 

She turned towards the child, her eyes twinkling with love and affection as she took the still shaking child into her arms and kissed her on the cold forehead.

“Happy fourth birthday, Sakura-chan. I hope you like your present.” 

Momoshi watched as the child looked into her eyes, those beautiful and vivid green eyes slightly red and teary full of questioning intent. She laughed, the sound like small bells tinkling. Without pause, she gently turned the child towards the sphenoid bone and pointed at it, her fingers gliding delicately at the edges of the bone. 

“Why, of course I’m referring to this. It took Mama quite a while to unwrap your present now, didn't I?” 

The child shivered even more and buried herself on Momoshi’s neck, silent sobs wracking her body although no tears fell from her eyes. Momoshi’s eyes darkened before it returned back to normal and started comforting the child, patting her back softly. It was the child's first time so she didn't mind as much, she would learn soon.

“Let’s go out and eat dango. You’ll have to take a bath though as we wouldn’t want our birthday girl to smell when we go out now, do we?” 

She smiled secretly when she noticed the child’s gaze lingering on the sphenoid bone as they left the white windowless room. She could see a hint of curiosity and awe hidden behind the fear, hesitation and disgust in the child’s eyes. Momoshi smiled, pleased at what she had seen. In time, she was sure that this child in her arms would soon fit right in with her in this room. If she had to make use of underhanded measures in the process, well, nobody would know.


	2. Happy Faces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She lifts up the boy’s downturned lips with her pale and small fingers, smiling as she does so. She thinks he looks better that way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura is five years old in this chapter. So we have had a timeskip of a year from the first chapter that is actually the prologue. This is probably one of the more normal chapters I have written. Ugh.
> 
> Very slight gore at the end and some hints of child abuse and bullying scattered throughout.

The sound of hushed whispers could be heard filling the small space that had been transformed into a playground. The adults were holding on to their children tightly while shielding them away from the presumed threat. Their eyes were blazing with fury and loathing as they stared towards the direction of the sandbox where a young boy with blonde hair was sitting, his back towards them. He was wearing an oversized gray shirt with the Uzumaki crest in the middle, dark blue pants, black sandals and had green goggles resting just above his forehead.

_‘It’s that thing, right?’_

_‘Kami, what is he doing here?’_

_‘I wonder why they’re letting someone like that roam freely.’_

_‘Ugh, call the shinobis over. That thing might be rabid.’_

_‘They should really just put a leash on that thing. Letting it mingle with the village after what it did sickens me.’_

_‘Kami, I have to look for a better place for my kid to play around.’_

_‘Arata, you shouldn’t have been playing with that thing!’_

_‘Misaki, don’t play around with it. It might bite you!’_

_‘This is just preposterous. They should lock him up somewhere the sun doesn’t shine. That thing isn’t human.’_

_‘That thing is a monster.’_

_‘Monster.’_

_‘It’s a monster.’_

“Ah! Hey, where are you going?”

A panicked cry broke through the cacophony of hushed voices that were anything but quiet. The adults looked towards the direction of the disruption and their eyes widened when they saw a small and delicate child with pink hair and green eyes walk towards the direction of the boy. A blue-haired man reached out to hold the child in place and keep her from continuing her approach. The other adults frowned and clutched their children closer to them.

“Hey, you… You should get back here!”

“Why?”

The blue-haired man was taken aback by the question that was filled with curiosity. The child looked up at him, her green eyes brimming with curiosity as to what answer they would give her. His face was scrunched up as if he had eaten something bad. His whole face had the words ‘this is why I dislike kids’ written on them.

“You shouldn’t approach that… Just… It’s dangerous.” 

The child inclined her head to the side, her bangs falling over to cover her eyes just slightly. A small and curious smile was on her lips.

“Why is he dangerous?”

The other adults gulped and looked at each other. The blue-haired man ran a free hand through his hair and his frown deepened as he opened his mouth a few times before closing it again. He looked at the child who was still gazing at him.

“That’s because that thing isn’t human. It’s a monster.” 

Something shifted in the eyes of the child and the blue-haired man felt chills run down his spine. His hand that was on the child’s shoulder suddenly felt weak and he could only let go of it. The other adults didn’t see how the child’s eyes looked when he had said the words and instead supported his claims.

“Yes. That thing isn’t a boy, it’s a rabid monster. It might bite you suddenly.”

“You should listen to your father’s words and get back here.”

The child slowly turned her gaze towards the adult, her eyes looking bright and cheery but was shrouded by a veil of tenebrosity. Her small pink lips stretched into a smile that was just teeth, giving the supposed innocent look a feeling of eeriness that was completely out of place on her angelic face. 

“Ah. This **thing** is not my father. **It** just likes touching little girls.” 

The adults recoiled from the veiled animosity they could feel hidden by the dripping saccharine tone that she had used to speak, their minds failing to register the words she had said at the end or the fact that she referred to the man as a thing. The child turned towards the blue-haired man once more, her eyes still looking dark and veiled. She smiled towards him, bowing slightly while she kept her eyes directed on the hand he had used to hold her back. Her eyes seemed as if she promised him something that he could and couldn’t understand at the same time. He gulped audibly and moved slightly back, laughing nervously. 

The other adults began shuffling their children out of the playground while shaking their heads at the sight of the pink-haired child approaching the thing they loathed and feared the most. It was a shame how some children were just hard headed and blind to good intentions. Anyway, if the child gets harmed, it wasn’t their problem now. They tried to warn the child so whoever was her parents couldn’t blame them at all.

“You children shouldn’t be like that child and listen to us. Don’t ever go approaching that blonde thing. It’s an abomination and you’ll die if you play with them!” 

Within a few seconds, the whole playground had changed from lively and filled with children’s laughter and chatter to silence that was heavy and filled with gloom. The large playground seemed even larger with only two small children left in it.

The only sound that could be heard was the occasional scraping of the plastic shovel and sand together as the blonde boy piled it higher and higher into a small mountain. 

“Can I play with you?”

The blonde boy turned to look towards the direction of the voice. Green clashed with blue. 

* * *

Sakura had first noticed him a few weeks ago. He was hiding behind a tree with his blonde hair peeking out slightly from the trunk that he was using as a shield to hide from. His eyes, she noted, were a very pretty shade of blue that reminded her of seafoam and the clear skies. He was wearing an oversized white shirt with the fire symbol in the middle, dark blue pants, black sandals and had green goggles resting just above his forehead. 

_Small_ , she had thought back then. She had always expected boys to be bigger than her considering how her mama always said she was more petite than other kids her age. It was the first time she had seen someone who was smaller than her. 

His eyes, she had noted, were filled with envy as he watched the other children play around with their parents and peers. She had wondered why but never got an answer from the adults, only a frown and a warning to not approach that boy. They never said why and she never asked again. Instead, she had opted to observe the boy whenever he would come around peeking as the other children played around. She had also noticed how often he would hunch over himself protectively as if he expected someone to hit him. Her eyes had darkened at the thought. 

Today, she had seen just how extreme the reaction of the adults were when they saw him approach the sandbox after being asked to play by one of the newer kids. Their whispers were jarring and grated at her ears with how they referred to a child as a thing instead of as a human being. Even if she was only five years old, the feeling of wrongness and indignance was strong enough to make her want to put them on the table down the white room. 

Had she been a normal child, she would have listened to their demands and decided to ignore the blonde boy. However, she had always been eccentric and unusual. The draw of curiosity had always been stronger for her, and something about the boy had caught her attention. 

“Can I play with you?” 

The blonde boy dropped the plastic shovel he was holding, turning around to look at her with wide and bright blue eyes that shone in the light.

_It’s really pretty_ , she thinks as she watches the myriad of emotions flit through the boy’s eyes. She got no reply from the other. A frown marred her face and her lips jutted out slightly in a pout. 

“You don’t want to?”

“D-do you really want to play with me?”

She inclined her head slightly towards the side and observed the boy. After a few seconds, she nodded her head resolutely.

“Of course. My mama told me I should never ask someone for something without meaning it.”

“Oh… I… Well, I’ve never played with anyone before.”

“So have I. My mama never let me play outside before. I’ve only been allowed out these past few weeks. She says it's supposed to be a lesson or something but I don’t know what it is about.” 

Sakura regarded the boy’s eyes with fascination when she saw how his eyes easily changed to reflect the emotion he was feeling. His face scrunched up in disgust and he prodded at the sand with his shovel.

“I don’t like studying.” 

“So do I.”

‘Oh.”

“But mama says that I should study anyway.”

“I don’t have a mama or a papa. Jiji says that it happens sometimes and that he’ll tell me when I’m older.”

Sakura blinked slightly. She gazed into the boy’s face with a contemplative gaze, poking his cheeks with whisker lines slightly. 

“Hey, are you really a monster?”

The boy’s eyes widened before turning downcast. She felt a spike of chakra from the trees above them and it took all of her willpower to not look towards the source. Instead, she focused on the boy’s face. She cupped his cheeks with her hands and peered into his slightly sad face. She smiled.

“You don’t look like a monster to me.”

He perked up.

“Really?”

“Yeah. But if you really are a monster, then maybe we can be monsters together.”

The boy’s eyes widened in elation before it turned into confusion.

“B-but they call me a monster because I have something sealed inside me. You don’t have something like that, right?”

Sakura kept her smile before putting a finger on her lips. 

“Secret.” 

The blonde boy pouted and muttered that it was unfair that she got to keep a secret. His face was scrunched up slightly as he pouted and stabbed the mountain of sand he had made. Sakura giggled and prodded his arm. She noted how delicate it was and her mind wondered just how much strength would she need to break it. She shook her head slightly to get rid of the thought, reminding herself of what her mama had told her. Everything was a secret. However, looking over the gloomy air that hovered over the blonde’s head, she decided to tell him something. 

Leaning over him slightly and motioning for him to move closer, she lowered her voice to make it sound as if she was telling a very big secret to the boy.

“We’re both monsters because I also don’t have a papa.” 

“Oh.”

The two of them silently played around the sandbox, Sakura noting the way that the source of chakra from the trees occasionally spiking up when the boy talks about things her mama would have never let her speak of. In return, she would smile and tell him about the lessons her mama would tell her, talking about the village's history and how the Hokage's were like before. She had learned that her new friend seemed to have an inclination and a vested interest in Hokages. She acted as if she didn't notice though. She didn't like to pry things out of someone. 

They played for a long time, moving from the sandbox to the swings and the benches and back to the sandbox again. Sakura mused how today didn't seem quite as boring as the past few times she had been here before.

When the skies were slightly dyed by red, Sakura saw her mama approaching. She stood up and dusted off her clothes and hair, looking as prim and proper as she was before, as if she hadn’t been playing in the sandbox a few seconds ago. The blonde boy looked at her with a puzzled expression before turning to glance at the approaching adult. He tensed slightly but relaxed when her mama didn’t look at him with disgust. 

“...”

“Mama.”

“It’s time to go home.”

She nodded her head obediently.

When she was about to move towards her, she felt a light tug at the hem of her shirt. She turned to see the boy with his head down. She inclined her head, wondering what he wanted before she heard him ask if she was going to come back again tomorrow.

“I-if you are, can we play again?”

“Of course. We’re friends, right?”

The boy looked up, shock coloring his face. He scrunched up his face into a frown as he tried to stop the gathering tears from falling. Sakura acted as if she hadn’t seen it. Instead, she moved her fingers to lift the edges of his lips to form it into a pseudo-smile. 

“Next time, you should give me a smile. I think it looks better on you, friend.” 

The boy placed an arm on his eyes, wiping the salty water away to help him see clearly. He nodded and promised that he’d give her a big smile when they see each other next time. Sakura nodded, happy with the promise that the blonde boy had given her. Raising her hand, she wiggled her fingers slightly in a facsimile of a wave. 

Her mama gave her an approving glance as she looked over the blonde boy again. Sakura saw no signs of recognition in her eyes and wondered if she knew who he was. If she did though, she gave away no indication of having known so. 

“You did a good job today, Sakura.” 

She nodded her head, keeping her hands behind her as she walked a step behind her mama. She failed to notice the scrutinizing gaze that her new blonde friend had directed towards her and her mama as they walked away.

* * *

Later, when they were back in their home and inside the white room again. Her mama would ask her what she thought about her new friend.

“I like his eyes. They are very pretty.” She would answer back with a small smile as her delicate hands dexterously unfurled the brain onto the table, her face betraying no sense of disgust or fear. She never saw the calculating gaze that her mama gave when she continued to tell her about the little quirks the boy had.

“Somehow, I just want to keep him.” 

“I see.” 

“Is that bad?”

“Not really. Remember what I said before?”

“Yea.”

“Just make sure you take care not to break that one. He’s as precious as they come.”

“I know. I wouldn’t want his blue eyes to look like this. It would be a waste.”

Momoshi merely gave her a smile as she watched Sakura crush an eyeball with her bare hands. Her charge had gone a long way from her first lesson. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We might just be unkind  
> But that's just how we're designed  
> You got me so fucked up  
> Think about you most of the time  
> Then I think about losing my mind
> 
> \- Sick Thoughts by Lewis Blisset -


	3. Fluffy Cottontail

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She gently reached out her hand, savoring the feel of velvet and the warmth of sunshine bloom. She breathes out a happy gasp when she stares into beautiful blue, blue eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also wonder why the title is that way. 
> 
> Just a warning:
> 
> Implied child neglect, emotional abuse and slight physical abuse. Maybe some bit of gore but like only if you squint at the start.

_ The smell of rust and copper mixed in with the nauseating piquant scent of burnt flesh. The grating sound of metal on stone echoed loudly throughout the enclosed space, white and yellow sparks brightened the dark room as tiny heated steel was peeled away by the solid rock. The light from these sparks were short-lived, their glow dying before they even reached the ground.  _

_ A small and delicate hand that was sticky with half coagulated blood held an unsheathed moroha tanto in one hand, the blade dripping with blood while pointed downwards. Her other hand held a smaller tanto blade and was scoring it down the rock wall, causing sparks to fly out. _

_ The meagre and short-lived light from the sparks eerily illuminated her face. Vivid green eyes that were veiled with darkness and the promise of agony were glowing brightly like a cat’s. It seemed out of place in her childish and youthful face. Her complexion was pale, paler than was normal, a result of her months of confinement in this room where she was taught everything she would ever need to know.  _

_ A gentle smile was etched onto her face. Had the room been a well-lit place, she would have looked positively angelic. However, the cover of darkness and the shadows that came with the sparks’ illumination made her look eerily out of place.  _

_ Scuttling sounds could be overheard in the cover of darkness. Hurried and shallow breaths and gasps filled with pain were amplified a hundred times inside the dark room. Terror-filled and agonized groans filled the lacuna during the intervals of breaths and gasps. The scent of approaching death intermingled with palpable fear and tension it could paralyze an elephant in place.  _

_ Despite all this, the child (because she was nothing more than a child) had walked in a sedate pace, her whole body neither betraying anything to discern her mood. The blood on her hand had long since stopped dripping, turning slightly flaky while coagulated clumps pooled over the space where her palm met the hilt of her tanto.  _

_ “N-no… P-please… Have mercy…” _

_ She stopped in place and slightly turned towards the owner of the voice. Her glowing eyes easily discerned the form of a half-crumpled teen lying down on the cold and hard floor. Blood was flowing from his stomach. It was a large wound. She noted that she hadn’t made it. She preferred to keep it clean and simple, not something ragged and drawn out like this. His eyes were trained on her direction, their eyes meeting despite the cover of darkness.  _

_ “Do you want me to save you?” _

_ “No. I… I want you to kill me. It wo-ack.”  _

_ Blood flowed out of the teen’s mouth and her eyes glowed even brighter. She lowered her head slightly and her grip on her tanto tightened. Her expression did nothing to betray what she was thinking though. _

_ “Why should I?” _

_ “Y-you… This is a test, isn’t it?” _

_ “Yes, and?” _

_ “If you… huff… kill me… You’d get points. I… I’m also… haah... “ _

_ The child frowned. The teen’s face wasn’t familiar to her, but considering the fact that he had been sent inside her room, she could surmise that he was one of them. She had ended them earlier on, the remaining ones filled with far too much terror that they could only run away and groan out in agony. This one though… _

_ “Mitra likes you.” _

_ “I…” _

_ “So you can’t die.” _

_ “...I need to… urk, die…” _

_ “I don’t know why Mitra likes you. But you won’t die just yet.” _

_ Saying so, she turned the teen over so that he lay weakly on his back, his eyes half-closed and feverish. She inclined her head. Channeling chakra through her tanto, she stabbed down towards his chest, her gentle smile still in place even when blood marred her face. The teen groaned out in pain before heaving a tired but relieved sigh. His eyes slowly closed and his body became lax.  _

_ She smiled. _

* * *

Naruto had always been alone. 

Despite his young age, he had always known that something about him was different from other children. The gazes that the people at the orphanage he was staying at gave him were hot and sharp. Nobody had ever looked at him softly as they did the other orphans. Their voices were always clipped and direct to the point. The only one who ever spoke nicely to him was his jiji who was more often away than with him. He had wanted to ask him if he would take him in, take him away but he had an inkling that he would only be disappointed. So he had never asked. 

_ If he could, why would he let you stay in this place? _

He had always held out a little bit of hope that he would get chosen by a pair of loving parents just as the other kids had. Nobody ever chose him. Everyone steered clear of him and treated him like an unwanted weight that they were saddled with. He didn’t know what that meant, but he had heard one of the matrons say that. 

When he was a little bit older, he found out that he wasn’t only hated by the people in the orphanage. No, the whole village seemed to detest him. Even if he was a kid, he could feel that they treated him differently. Their gazes were even more scorching and painful. Their words were laced with venom and poison. As young as he was, he wasn’t stupid. His jiji told him that he was only imagining things, that everything would get better when he was older - he knew it wouldn’t.

The first time he ever made a friend, it didn’t even last for a minute before the child had been dragged away from him. The mother of the child had glared at him, called him a monster. The child never played with him again and had started calling him a monster as well. It hurt, but he wasn’t deterred. 

He tried hard to be a good boy. He was obedient and silent. He didn’t cry out loud or made a fuss as every other child he saw would do. He learned how to care for himself, how to eat properly without dropping a morsel of food and making a mess. He would keep a smile on his face and even when one of the kids threw a rock at him, he didn’t get mad. In the end, he never got anywhere. His fourth birthday came and went but aside from the well wishes of his jiji, no one else seemed happy to know he had grown older. 

_ ‘It would be better if that thing was put down.’ _

_ ‘That thing isn’t human, it’s a monster wearing a kid’s skin.’ _

_ ‘Ugh, I don’t even understand why the Third Hokage keeps visiting him.’ _

_ ‘Shush! If that thing hears you, we might as well be eaten up.’ _

_ ‘It’s rabid, I say. Rabid! They should put it down.’ _

_ ‘Tsk. It’s annoying how we can’t simply throw it out into the streets.’ _

_ ‘Hey! The Third Hokage will kill us if we do that!’ _

_ ‘Fuck, I want to have a pay raise. I’m the one having to feed that thing.’ _

_ ‘That’s a monster.’ _

_ ‘A monster.’ _

His young heart had broken when he heard the matrons talk about him like that. He ran away and hid atop the Hokage Mountain and cried. He wanted to hurt them and he felt something like hatred bubble over his heart. He resisted though. He didn’t want to prove them right. He wasn’t rabid. He wasn’t a monster. He was just him. Plain old Naruto who didn’t have parents. He just wanted to be a good boy, but why could no one notice that?

In the end, nothing changed. His good deeds were always overlooked and disgust would always filter through the people he met. Even if he wanted to simply help, an act as simple as touching a fallen fruit and returning it back had earned him a hit to the head with a rock. 

_ ‘Get out here, you fucking monster!’ _

_ I just wanted to help… I really just wanted to help… Why can’t anyone of you see that? I’m not a monster. I’m not. I’m not. I’m Naruto. _

_ ‘Monster.’ _

_ ‘Monster.’ _

_ ‘Monster.’ _

As if the wall that had always held back his resentment suddenly broke, he took the stone that the man had thrown at him and threw it back just as strong. The stone hit the man’s nose and blood poured out. He could hear the outraged and fearful gasps that followed in the wake of his actions. Whispers about him being rabid could be heard, but he didn’t care. If they wanted him to be a monster, then he would be one. He’d show them all. He’d make them need him, make them see him, make them know that they owe their life and existence to him. 

He wasn’t a monster, no. But if they wanted him to be one, then he would stop trying to be good. He had walked out of the alley with a resolute but lonely back. And in the morning, sounds of outraged outbursts echoed continuously as the normally pristine walls of their houses and stores were vandalized by dripping wet paint. Round squiggles and unreadable words were graffitied on every single space.

Rambunctious laughter caught everyone’s attention and watched in horror as Naruto stood there, a paint bucket in one hand and a paintbrush in the other.

“I’m Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo! And I’m gonna be a Hokage.” 

Despite knowing that his actions only led to anger the people more, he didn’t stop. He didn’t start avoiding them anymore and even the playground where he could only take a peek before had become a spot that he would visit often. He didn’t mind the way that the adults would herd their children out of the place as if he was a rabid dog who would start biting. He didn’t mind that he was left alone to play. He liked being alone anyway. It was better than being with others and subjected to their scorching and hateful gazes. 

“Can I play with you?”

He had been surprised by the sudden question that was directed to him. He didn’t mind it though he waited with bated breath for the other child to run away from him. His heart nearly broke when she asked him if he was a monster. 

_ “If you really are a monster, then we can be monsters together.” _

_ “We’re both monsters because I also don’t have a papa.” _

When her mama had come to pick her up, he had hesitated but asked nevertheless if they could play again. Her reply had left him in tears and for the first time since he could remember, someone had called him as a friend and asked to see him smile. He promised he would when they meet again and his new friend went home with her mama. His eyes darkened slightly in confusion when she didn’t hold hands with her mama as they walked away, his thought was that maybe she really was just like him. 

The following morning, the Third Hokage had visited him and they talked about his new friend. His jiji was listening patiently while he retold the whole event that transpired. 

“Well, what’s the name of your new friend?”

He scrunched up his face and his eyes widened.

“Oh no! I forgot to ask her! But she had the beautifulest pinkest hair and greenest eyes.”

His jiji smiled and ruffled his hair.

“Don’t forget to ask your friend her name.”

“I definitely won’t forget next time, dattebayo!” 

Later, in the afternoon, when he met his new friend again and she asked for his name, he couldn’t help the bright smile that appeared on his face.

“I’m Uzumaki Naruto and I’m gonna be the best Hokage, dattebayo!”

“Hello, Uzumaki Naruto, who will be the best Hokage, my name is Haruno Sakura. I hope we can be friends for the longest time.”

He nodded his head, slightly giddy as he rolled her name over and over in his mind. He thought her name fit her so perfectly, just like the way the Sakura blossoms looked like when it was spring. 

* * *

Hiruzen stared at the file laid out on his table. It was thin, one of the thinnest he had ever seen though considering the fact that she was a civilian child, it wasn’t anything alarming. 

“And you say that there is little to no risk that she is a bait planted by enemy villages?” 

“None, Sandaime-sama. The child was born and brought up inside the village and has never had any contact with foreigners. There has also been no record of her going out from the village with her guardian. She is often sick though and has visited the hospital several times due to light anemia and stomach aches before.”

“I see.” He waved his hand and the Anbu vanished from the room. He turned over the file again and stared pensively at the name of the parents. The father’s name was blank while the mother’s name was listed as Haruno Momoshi. His eyes darkened slightly as he recalled a woman with blonde hair and a man with dull pink hair.

“I wonder…”

* * *

“Why are we here, mama?”

Momoshi glanced down towards Sakura who was looking at the front door of the shop with interest. Her eyes brightened slightly when a child with a puppy had come out. She grinned inwardly and mused how despite how old and mature Sakura can be, she still had a childish side to her. 

_ But then again, she is only five years old _ .  _ Things aren’t quite the same as during my time as a child. _

“We’re here for another part of your lesson.”

“About what?”

“About life.”

The child looked confused for a moment. 

“Why?”

“Because, Sakura, one can only truly learn the fragility of something when they have experienced it by themselves. So today, you will be choosing your partner. You’ll be protecting them just as they will protect you. You will care for them just as they will for you. You will feed them, you will bathe them, you will play with them, but most importantly, you will love them.”

“Oh.”

“So are you ready?”

The child nodded her head. 

It took them quite a while to find the perfect one. Momoshi knew that they had found the one when the child had petted one of the smaller puppies that had approached her. Her eyes were gentle and bright, making her look far too much her age. When the puppy opened his eyes and looked into bright green eyes, Sakura had gasped happily.

“I love him.” 

Blue eyes and green eyes met.

Momoshi smiled. Everything was just in time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're sad, don't let it show  
> Say "I'm happy! I'm happy! I'm happy today!"  
> I'm happy! I'm happy! I'm happy today!  
> They say, "Put on a happy face!"
> 
> \- Happy Face by Jagwar Twin -


	4. Ischemic Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She stared intently at the slightly exposed neck, her mind calculating how much force she would need to tear through the skin and muscle to sever the carotid artery and jugular vein.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title, as usual, makes no sense. Please don't ask. I'll also apologize if my writing sucks. I'm good at making plot summaries and plotlines, writing them though... I suck at them. So thank you for bearing with me. 
> 
> Trigger warning:
> 
> Bullying, slight gore, torture and child abuse (physically, emotionally and psychologically). 
> 
> I hate myself. I hate Momoshi too, but there's a reason behind her actions, swear. Doesn't mean I like her though. Ugh. We also get a small glimpse of a baby yandere Sakura. But like, just a little bit.

_Pained cries and cursing could be heard intermittently throughout the large compound. Hurried footsteps and sloshing water paired with concerned voices would fill in the short silent gaps before the pained cries would echo again._

_A child with beautiful dark red wavy hair that was cut short to her shoulders, framing her childish face. Her eyes were vivid green ones that were veiled slightly. She had a pale complexion and her lips were drawn into a tight line as she clasped the edges of her sash tightly. Her eyes were trained on the closed door that would open for a bit before it closed again after the needed items were brought in._

_Her father had told her that her mother was bringing ‘new life’ into their clan today. The sound of pained cries and curses made her frown deeper. If her mother was bringing in new life, then why did she sound as if she was dying? Why was there the smell of blood and the palpable taste of pain and the heavy weight of lingering death in the air? Why was her mother’s chakra fluctuating so badly as if one moment it would be snuffed out?_

_She had many questions, but no one was there to give her answers. So she waited patiently, sitting on the engawa and her back turned away from the doors. Her chakra constantly seeked out her mother’s and her breathing would stop sometimes when she felt her mother’s large chakra reserves dip down so low she feared she was emptied out._

_After what seemed like hours, the sound of pained cries and curses was replaced by a shrill and continuous crying that seemed to announce to the world that a new life had been brought into it. She felt her mother’s chakra settle down and it calmed her frayed nerves. Sounds of congratulations could be heard throughout the room and relieved sighs were released by the haggard midwives and clan members who had been helping out._

_A new bucket filled with warm water and clean towels were brought in while the soiled ones were sent out of the room. The smell of blood slightly lessened and was replaced with the gentle smell of honeysuckle and sunshine._

_She stood up from her sitting position and turned to wait for the door to open and for her father to call her in. When the last person aside from her parents had come out, the door was left open, a tacit invitation for her to enter._

_Her footsteps were muted and silent, as if she was floating instead of walking. Her eyes slightly squinted, unused in the slight darkness of the room as compared to the bright world outside._

_“Surya, come.”_

_Her father gestured for her to come forward. She did so, her eyes not leaving the wrapped bundle that her mother held carefully._

_“This is your little brother.”_

_Her mother turned the bundle slightly towards her and she watched, fascinated at how delicate he looked like._

_“He looks just like you did when you were a baby, Surya.”_

_“Oh.”_

_“Do you like him?”_

_She looked at the baby, her eyes barely revealing anything. Her mother and father looked at each other, a bit of worry in their eyes at her lack of response. When the baby opened his eyes ever so slightly, the child gasped softly. She had seen his eyes turn just a little bit red like her hair was before it vanished into inky black orbs._

_“Surya?”_

_“I love him.”_

_Her father smiled slightly and placed a comforting arm on her mother’s shoulders before giving her a kiss on her forehead._

_“C-can I hold him?”_

_Her mother looked towards her father who shook his head. Instead, he turned towards her and slightly took hold of her hands, caressing them slightly as if in comfort._

_“Your brother is far too delicate right now. If you hold him with these hands of yours, they may hurt him.”_

_“Oh.”_

_She bowed her head in understanding, keeping herself content in gazing at the small bundle of joy. Her mother smiled comfortingly._

_“We don’t have a name for him yet. Do you want to name him?”_

_She blinked slightly, her head bobbing in response. Her eyes curved into a gentle smile and her eyes glowed just a bit brighter than usual._

_“Indra. His name will be Indra.”_

* * *

“This is Fuwa.”

Naruto stared at the small puppy that was snuggled safely in Sakura’s small arms, his nose twitching slightly in his sleep. He looked at his friend and then back at the small puppy, Fuwa, she had called him. His eyes were burning with curiosity at the small puppy who looked far too unlike the dogs that he had met before. 

“Come here and say hello, Naruto-kun.” 

He gulped, slightly nervous that the puppy would bite him or worse, hate him. He had never been in close proximity to a dog or a puppy which was relatively smaller and looked far more delicate than their bigger counterparts. Sakura, seeing his hesitation, approached him slowly. She grabbed his hand and gently placed it to rest on the sleeping puppy’s head. Almost by instinct, he had released just a tiny bit of chakra, enough to make the tensed body of the puppy to fall lax in the warmth of his palm.

He smiled so brightly when he felt the puppy relax, his heart beating erratically but this time from excitement of being close to a lifeform more delicate than he was. Not that anyone else was tougher than him. The people would always whisper that he was scourge that couldn’t be removed. He knew they meant bad by that but if it meant they could never be rid of him, then he didn’t mind it. 

“He… He’s so soft, dattebayo!” 

Sakura giggled slightly before pulling over Naruto’s hand so that they could take a seat on the grass, just at the base of the tree. Afterwards, she placed the sleeping puppy on his lap. He tensed, not sure as to what he should do next. The puppy decided for him though, as it nuzzled into his palm, looking for the same warmth that he emitted while gently caressing the puppy’s head earlier.

“Fuwa likes you, Naruto kun.”

He gulped, tears slightly forming down his eyes at the statement. No one had ever liked him before, not in this way. His jiji had always been there for him but there were certain things that he could never give Naruto. The comfort of being said that he was liked, even if it was by a puppy made his heart overflow with warmth and happiness. 

“I… Nobody ever liked me before.”

“Well, I like you and Fuwa likes you. I’m sure in the future, you’ll be very well-liked, Naruto-kun.”

“Really?”

She wiped away the dampness forming in his eyelids and smiled gently and assuredly.

“Of course. You’re going to be the best Hokage, aren’t you? And if you are the best Hokage, then that means that people will like you. Either way, I still like you regardless of who you become.”

He blushed at the declaration. 

“Even if I become a monster?”

“We’re already monsters, aren’t we?”

“Yea.”

“Besides, we’re good monsters.”

He laughed happily at the declaration and pumped up a fist. 

“Yosh! Let’s be the best monster together, Sakura-chan!”

The puppy whimpered from being disturbed by Naruto’s racket and opened his eyes ever so slightly. Blue met blue and the rest was history. 

“Oh my gosh! Fuwa has the same eyes as me, Sakura-chan! That’s so awesome, dattebayo!”

Before Sakura could reply though, the happy atmosphere was broken by the sudden appearance of five children who looked older than they were. Their faces changed from laughing to sneering when they saw the two of them playing together.

“Well, well, well. Look who we have here. A monster and a freak, aren’t they a great combination?”

“Pfft, Amaki, don’t be mean. Freaky Sakura-chan finally made a friend, we should give them a greeting, don’t you think so?”

Naruto frowned and glared at the way older children in front of him, his eyes narrowed angrily. He could let it go if they called him a monster, but to have his friend be called a freak was something he would never forgive. Gently giving back the puppy to Sakura, he stood up and faced the unwelcomed newcomers with a fierce glare.

“Hey, take that back, you buttheads!” 

The older children stopped laughing, as if surprised that Naruto had spoken before they laughed even louder, clutching their stomach from the intensity of their laugh. Sakura tugged his sleeves down and shook her head. He frowned.

“Pfft, looks like we have a fighter here. Ne, Freaky Sakura, how did you end up befriending the monster? Did you buy this thing off with favors? Or did you use your freaky forehead to intimidate this thing to submi-owww! That fucking hurt!”

Naruto ignored the worried shout of Sakura before he clamped down harder on the older child’s arm. One of them began hitting his head but he did not mind the pain at all. He had gotten far worse from the adults before that the fist pounding on his head and back didn’t even hurt as much. He clamped his teeth down harder though and didn’t stop even when he tasted the familiar coppery and rusty flavor of blood at the tip of his tongue. The other child was crying now and shrieking for him to let go. 

“Pwell Shakura-wan fer shery furst!” 

“Fucking monster! Itona! Hit him, fuck! Get him off already!”

One of the older children reared back and hit him in his chin. His bite loosened and his eyes started seeing stars. He groaned out in pain before he slumped down, his eyes slowly losing focus yet still filled with so much anger. The last thing he heard was the sound of barking and a yelp of pain. Then there was darkness.

* * *

  
  


“NARUTO!”

Sakura’s heart felt as if it suddenly stopped breathing when she saw her friend’s eyes lose focus as he fell down limply. One of the older children had wanted to kick him again but was stopped when she sicked Fuwa on them. He had gotten a bite but had been ruthlessly kicked aside and her heart felt pain as she listened to him whimper.

Anger filled her veins and her eyes darkened as she slowly moved towards them. She was muttering, cataloguing the different areas of their bodies she could hit. 

_Armpits. Legs. Chest. Neck. Neck. Neck. Neck._

A large amount of chakra suddenly spiked out from her body, lighting her up like a beacon before it moved towards her hands. Almost as if in a trance, her eyes focused on the slightly exposed neck. Her mind was calculating how much force she would need to tear through the skin and muscle to sever the carotid artery and jugular vein.

Before her hands could make contact with her target though, a masked person suddenly appeared and held her hand in place. Her eyes darkened even more at the thought that someone had stopped her from doing what was right, from defending Naruto and Fuwa. She had begun directing her chakra to her leg when she recalled her mama’s warning about always keeping her chakra in-check. Paling, her chakra was withdrawn suddenly, almost as if the sudden flare of chakra had just been an accidental fluke that happened in the moment of rage. 

“Now, now, what’s happening here?” 

Sakura’s eyes hid a glare as she glanced at the masked man. 

“N-n-nothing, Anbu-san!”

The masked man, Anbu-san, had nodded his head serenely, almost as if he hadn’t seen anything that transpired. He gave them a light warning, telling them to start practicing if they ever want to graduate from the Academy and be promoted as Genin. He waved his hands in an oddly relaxed way and watched as they scampered away as fast as humanly possible.

“Let me go, mister.” 

Sakura demanded, her voice even but laced with impatience and a little bit of indignance when the masked man made no indication of letting go. The masked man suddenly let go of her arm as if he was burned and raised it in an appeasing motion. She ignored him and walked over to Naruto and Fuwa, her eyes betraying her worry. She checked his breathing and opened his eyes before relaxing when she saw that everything seemed normal. 

“Aren’t you going to thank me?”

She looked back at him, her eyes unreadable and just a little bit judgmental.

“Thanks, mister.”

The Anbu-san looked at her curiously but did not make a response to the snarky tone she used while thanking him. When she reached Fuwa, she let out a tired sigh when she saw that aside from a slight limp, he was fine. Picking him up, she sat beside Naruto and waited for her friend to wake up. When the Anbu-san’s presence disappeared into one of the trees, she gave no indication that she had noticed anything at all. 

* * *

“You may leave now, thank you for your report. Tell Neko that her new task is to observe the child and report to me regarding the hideout.” 

A muffled ‘yes’ was heard before smoke and leaves enveloped the form of the Anbu and disappeared as if he had not even been there in the first place.

Hiruzen sighed tiredly as he observed from his crystal ball, Naruto and Sakura who had moved from the park into a large hollow that had been transformed into a hideout. He took note of the hanging wind chimes and strung up origami papers by the entrance that was covered with a curtain of moss and thin bark as a make-shift door. 

The place looked oddly familiar and not at the same time. The floor had looked the same as many years ago when he had been invited to visit that ‘cubbyhole’ by his student. However, instead of the bare wooden floor, he saw that it was covered with a few rugs and thick fluffy blankets.

There was a separate corner made of gnarled roots and branches that was filled with stuffed toys that looked like they were cut apart and sewn back together, a few plush pillows and a warm black blanket. The ‘ceiling’ of the cubbyhole was filled with alternating overhanging vines and strings of origami and what looked to be woven wreaths of dried pine needles. There were several shelves carved out from the walls that had a spattering of boxes, books, glass jars and small potted plants that were right in front of the small hollow that acted as a window.

His eyes focused back on the two children who were busy playing with the puppy as if nothing had happened a few hours ago. He sighed tiredly at the memory of how Naruto had been hit by an older child, but made no move to sanction the perpetrators despite knowing who they were. The villagers were already feeling more apprehensive of the boy, if he as the Hokage moved to protect him openly, Naruto would only suffer even more. It was better to let things pass by as they were. In turn, the Anbu he had assigned as guards would also keep Naruto safe and away from any who would cause him true harm. 

His eyes darkened slightly as he watched the pink-haired child who had been quite a large wrench against his calculations and plans. It was a pleasant surprise to know that Naruto had found a friend who was around his own age. Whether or not she was a threat though, still needed to be determined.

His eyes moved to look at the Hokage Mountain and sighed when his eyes landed on the Fourth’s carved face. The shadows on his face made him look even more jaded and older. 

* * *

Momoshi turned towards Sakura, her eyes darkening slightly as she took note of the lack of the seal that she had placed on her body. For the past months, ever since the child’s chakra reserves grew exponentially, a seal had been placed on her body every day to keep her chakra from being released and catching the attention of the wrong people. Today, for some reason, Sakura had broken that seal voluntarily. The fact that she hadn’t felt the fluctuation pointed out that it was only for a few scant seconds. 

_Those few seconds are enough to catch the eyes of the wrong people._

“Sakura. You used chakra.”

Sakura’s happy and childish aura melted into one of indifference as she looked at Momoshi with the eyes of a student who was talking to their teacher. The puppy had been gently dropped onto the floor and had curled over the child’s feet but was ignored as she kept her focus on Momoshi’s eyes.

“Yes, sensei.”

“Did you remember what I told you?”

“I…”

“I told you to never use your chakra.”

“.. I know… But I did it for a good reason.”

“A good reason?”

“Yes, sensei. I was trying to defend Uzumaki Naruto and Haruno Fuwa.”

Momoshi lowered her gaze and a dark chuckle escaped her partially opened mouth. Her eyes were deep and shadowed, and Sakura trembled slightly in fear and trepidation. Momoshi felt a sliver of delight pass over her body at the sight.

_Good,_ she thinks, _this child remembers her lesson._

“Were you fighting shinobi?”

“...No.”

“Was there a possibility of death?”

“...No…”

“Were you physically attacked?”

Sakura lowered her gaze and shook her head in response. 

“I see. So you disobeyed what I had said before about not using your chakra then?”

Momosh sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose with her thumb and index finger.

“It seems like you need to have another review on controlling your chakra fluctuations, Sakura.”

Sakura paled slightly but did not make any sound. She nodded her head dejectedly and watched as Momoshi moved towards the direction of their white room. She looked down when Fuwa had whimpered and butted her leg with his head. She shook her head, patted him and settled him on the carpet.

“Be good, Fuwa. I’ll be back in a bit.”

Momoshi didn’t look back. She was confident that the child would follow her down to the white room even without being told to. She stared down at her hands and the thought that has always haunted her even before crossed her mind.

_Just what was the point of all this?_

* * *

The pain was enough to make her black-out. She clamped her mouth tightly, determined to not let a single sound out of her mouth. She watched as Momoshi, in her white lab gown, stared at her with eyes that had always been reserved for those days when she had disappointed her.

She kept her eyes open even when her eyes had been filled with blood as she watched Momoshi methodically cut open her body as she had done with all those bodies before. Her hands were precise, cold and sharp as she slowly cut through the muscles, the bones and the nerves. Pain wracked her whole body, enough to make her want to beg for mercy. But she knew that she shouldn’t. This was a lesson for her, a reminder as well as a punishment for her own failure to follow instructions. 

“Sakura, tell me what part of your body am I removing right now?”

She looked at the hand that slightly glowed a gentle green cut through her tibia and dug through her gastrocnemius. Her mind was half-delirious, half-aware and her voice sounded too far away.

“Momoshi-sensei… You just cut through my tibia and are now digging through my tibialis anterior.”

“And now?”

The sound of something crunching echoed crisply throughout the white room.

“...Haah… Y-you have… You have just crushed my k-kneecap.”

She felt a painful jolt of electricity course through her body and tears flowed out of her eyes unbidden. She bit down on her lips to prevent the cry of pain from escaping and blinked slowly.

“Sakura?”

“...You… You have crushed my patella, and cut through my patellar tendon.”

“And what would happen if the patella is crushed?”

“T-there is the possibility of inability to walk in the future and straighten the knee. As you have cut off my patellar tendon, there is no more possibility of straightening my knee. There is also a possibility that a piece of bone had been broken off along with the cut tendon.”

“Very good. Then what about this?”

“A pop could be heard followed by an immediate sharp pain in the back of her ankle and lower leg. She couldn’t feel her left leg after the kneecap had been broken. Momoshi must have cut off her superficial fibular nerve in the process. Her right leg had been moved now as well.

“The achilles tendon has been cut.”

“Good.”

She watched with indifferent eyes as the skin on her right leg was removed and the same process was done. Momoshi stopped when her legs had been turned into something unrecognizable now. 

“Has the lesson sunk in?”

She blinked, her inner voice wanting to scream out that she was right in wanting to protect Naruto and Fuwa, in wanting to retaliate and defend them. But she swallowed down the words and nodded her head in response.

“Yes, Momoshi-sensei. I remember the lesson.” 

Momoshi scrutinized her with an appraising glance and when she found what she was looking for, nodded her head. She waved her hand slightly and darkness filled Sakura’s eyes. When she opened her eyes again, Sakura found herself back in the white room, her body untouched as if nothing had happened. The phantom pain she had on her left and right legs begged to differ despite how her mind supplied that it was merely all the effect of Momoshi’s jutsu.

“I’m doing this for your own good, Sakura.”

She nodded her head silently.

“No matter how much I tell you to handle Naruto with care, my lessons, my instructions all come before that.” 

“I understand.”

“Good.”

She watched as Momoshi turned her back from her. Sakura’s eyes darkened slightly as an unnatural smile crossed her lips. It disappeared before a second passed however.

_Does not mean I won’t do it again._

Sakura mused inwardly. In the end, it wasn’t as if the things done to her in the white room were anything new after all. Naruto and Fuwa on the other hand; she had wanted to keep them safe, untouched, unharmed. 

_I’m the only one allowed to hurt them, to break them._

She blinked, the thought passing through her mind unnoticed as if she hadn’t even thought it up in the first place.

“Come, Sakura. It’s time for dinner.”

“Yes, mama.”

The two of them shared a smile as if nothing had transpired inside the white room in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blood on our hands  
> There's no telling what you'll find  
> In the shadows where we hide  
> Once you've seen it  
> There's no going back in time  
> It's a darkness you can't fight
> 
> \- Shoot to Kill by Tommee Profitt feat QUIVR -


	5. Honeysuckle Bloom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She felt something warm trail down her cheeks the moment her eyes met with his. Her heart beat slower and slower while her blood felt as if it was magma coursing through her body. She wants to rip the smile out of his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are slightly unfolding, but we've yet to even get into the crux of it all. Can anyone guess what's really happening? No? That's okay, but take note of the hints I drop. They're quite a lot and well, they'll all make sense when the picture comes together.
> 
> For once, this is like the most normal chapter I've written so far. Yey! 
> 
> I like honeysuckle. It's sweet but also dangerous. Hahaha

_ The tranquil silence that surrounded the clan compound early in the morning was suddenly broken by the loud creak of wood followed by its groan as a part of the main clan house suddenly collapsed. Dust, wood, and debris mixed in the air without showing signs of settling down any time soon. Loud and frantic cries echoed through the compound as the nearest clan members rushed to help assess the situation.  _

_ A woman with long red hair and translucent green eyes ran towards the collapsing part of their house. Her eyes were filled with panic and worry, her mouth slightly open as she took in the damage that was happening. However, the only thought in her head was what happened to her daughter.  _

_ “Surya… Has anyone seen Surya?!” _

_ “Sati-hime! You mustn't! It’s dangerous to go there!” _

_ The woman shook off a well-meaning hand that restrained her to no avail. Her eyes blazed hotly mixed with indignation and agitation. _

_ “That’s Surya’s room. How can I not go there?!” _

_ “Sati-hime! We… We also worry about Surya-ojosama, but the Head would murder us if we let anything happen to you right now! You’re expecting a child! We cannot have you risk yourself.” _

_ “I know my own body! Don’t lecture me! And Surya is only a child! She’s four years old… I can’t… What if she’s…. I need to be there… I need…” _

_ “Sati-hime… You…” _

_ “Let go of me, this instant.” _

_ “I can’t Sati-hime, this is for your own good.” _

_ “Let go of me or I’ll kill you. You know I will, Totosai.”  _

_ Her eyes glowed even brighter and the hand restraining her slowly let go. The other clan members took a step back when they saw the dark and heavy aura that the woman was emitting from her lithe body. When she finally saw them make a way for her towards the still crumbling side of the house, she felt her heart slightly stop beating. She paled slightly as she rushed towards it, using what little of her chakra she could use without harming the growing life inside her to stabilize the situation.  _

_ Her sharp senses caught no scent of rust and copper, and a part of her calmed down at the thought that no wound Surya may have sustained were serious enough to bleed. Regardless, it was not enough to completely quell the panic that she was feeling as she meticulously expanded her chakra to feel out for her daughter’s chakra signature.  _

_ Her head pivoted towards the middle of all the chaos where a large amount of overwhelming chakra presence suddenly made an appearance. Her heart dropped down to her stomach when she realized what had happened. _

_ Surya, her precious innocent daughter with her pretty brownish-red hair and black eyes was standing in the middle of the chaos, her face a mix of confusion and blankness. Her hair was turning a different shade of red, far too dark and too vivid, closer to the shade that was her clan’s signature hair color.  _

_ “Surya…” _

_ The child turned towards her and a muffled sob escaped the woman’s partly closed lips. Her daughter’s eyes had slowly bled out the dark and inky color, replaced by the translucent and vivid green ones that were far too alike to her own.  _

_ “No…” _

_ She murmured as she slowly approached her daughter who was looking fairly unharmed save from the sudden change of her coloring.  _

_ “Mama…?” _

_ “Surya…” _

_ She reached out carefully and held her daughter’s small and delicate hands with her own slightly larger ones. Tears slowly fell out of her eyes as she took in the way her daughter seemed far too lost and innocent despite the sudden changes happening around her.  _

_ “Oh, Surya… I never wanted this to happen.” _

* * *

Moonlight filtered through the glass windows that were partly covered by black curtains. The small gap where the curtains were parted had allowed the dim and mellow light to illuminate the dark room, filling it with an eerie but ethereal glow. The sound of gentle snores echoed softly throughout the room paired with the occasional sleepy sneezes and whimpers that the puppy that was curled up on a fluffy and large burrow bed. 

The bed that was large enough to fit an adult eclipsed the small size of the child sleeping on it. Her body was swallowed completely by the blanket and dwarfed by the large pillows she had around her. The moonlight was enough to illuminate her sleeping face. Her pink hair looked even more otherworldly, like the halo of an angel. Her pale face looked as if the moon had kissed her, making her glow ever so slightly. 

A hand gently reached out to touch her face, softly caressing her plump cheeks before moving on to touch the soft and silky pink strands of hair. A sad and quiet sigh was released by Momoshi as she took in the sleeping child’s form. When the child moved slightly, she reflexively moved a way, guilt and sadness pooling over her eyes before it was hidden and tucked away in the shadows of her eyes. 

“I’m sorry, Sakura…”

The rest of the words went unspoken. Her eyes were filled with reproach and hate before it was replaced by guilt, sadness, then indifference once more.

She stayed in place for a few more minutes, gently watching over the sleeping child. A small fond smile was etched onto her face. Sakura looked so much like  **‘him’** that it was sometimes physically painful for her to see her smile and laugh. Her thoughts would sometimes betray her, asking if things would have been any different if she had been stronger, if she had been better, if this child had not been born at all. 

But looking down at her charge, the sleeping form looking so much her age, she knew that she had to keep the promise she made. 

_ ‘Protect her. Make her strong. Stronger than you, than me, than us. She must be strong, Momoshi. _ ’ 

She closed her eyes as the memory assailed her and the inadequateness of her own strength to give this child a normal life made her nauseated. But in this world of theirs, in this village that rejected people like them, weakness would kill her. Weakness would cost them everything. 

Regardless of how cruel it may seem, of how inhumane she has to be, she would ensure that Sakura would grow up well, strong and capable. This child, in the future, would carry upon her shoulders a burden unlike any others. And if to be strong enough to not fall down from that weight meant she had to grow up surrounded by the stench of death and decay, touched by pain and kissed by ruthlessness, Momoshi would not hesitate to drown herself in this quagmire of sin.

“He’d be so proud of you, Sakura.” 

Her voice was small, smaller than a whisper, enough that it was nearly inaudible to anyone who would be listening. The warmth in her eyes were slowly withdrawn and veiled by the shadows of the night. She glanced at the sleeping child, tucking the small and pale arms inside the blanket. 

Without another word, she stood up and quietly arranged the curtains so that the mellow moonlight would no longer filter through the room. Darkness immediately filled the room as the black curtains blocked out the moonlight. Almost as if by reflex, Momoshi’s eyes glowed a vivid yellow green, the darkness not even impeding the way she navigated the room with ease. 

Passing by the burrowing bed that was slightly moving up and down in rhythm to the sleeping puppy’s breathing, she stopped for a moment and gave it an appraising glance. Crouching slightly, she reached out her hand and gave the sleeping puppy a light pat on the head, whispering a soft yet full-of-hidden-meaning message to him.

“Grow up well and healthy, Fuwa.” 

* * *

A slight chill was present in the air as the tail end of autumn slowly faded away to welcome the coming of the winter season. The leaves of the deciduous trees were falling out at a faster rate than before as if in preparation for the blanket of white snow and frost that were due in the future. 

The whistle of a slight breeze sounded throughout the whole park as if it was humming a lullaby to put the world slowly into sleep. The occasional rustling of leaves could be heard accompanying the shrill tone of the wind as it circled around. The skies were filled with fluffy white clouds, floating sedately throughout, covering the blue, blue skies and the bright sun. Sometimes, the sound of scurrying and falling nuts filled the silent gaps in between the whistle of the breeze and the rustle of the leaves.

“Sakura-chan!!!!”

The harmony of nature and the silence of man was broken suddenly by the loud exclamation. A blonde boy with blue eyes was towing a slightly taller man who was wearing the official ceremonial robes of the Hokage - the red, full-length kimono tied with a white sash and the customary red hat with a white half-veil that covered his head down to the shoulders aside from the front view of his face. 

Sakura startled slightly from her seat as she took in the person that her friend of almost five weeks now was slightly dragging towards their position. She blinked once, then rubbed her eyes as she made sure that she was not seeing an illusion. 

“Ne, ne, Sakura-chan! Remember the jiji I was talking to you about for so long? Ne? Ne?” 

She nodded her head, sparing the ‘suspected’ Hokage (because she had yet to prove he was really the Hokage despite the look of his clothing) a cursory glance. Naruto let go of the man’s hand and started jumping slightly in place, his hands clapping in rhythm to his jumps.

“Well, guess what, Sakura-chan?”

“...What?”

“Ehhhhhh, guess who my jiji is, Sakura-chan!”

Sakura gave her friend an unimpressed glance, her eyes barely looking over the newcomer yet her attention was never fully removed from him. Naruto pouted slightly and crossed his arms while his eyes narrowed like a fox’s.

“Aww, come on Skaura-chan, hehehe. Guess who, guess whooooo?”

“I don’t know.”

“Ehhhhhhhh.”

Sakura gave Naruto an irked look before knocking his head with a knuckle. Naruto groaned and whimpered while holding the abused part of his head and glaring at Sakura with narrowed eyes, looking so much like a petulant and spoiled child with his pouting lips. 

An amused chuckle escaped the person’s lips and his eyes that were veiled by the hat was slightly revealed when he moved his head back in laughter. Amused brown eyes clashed with vivid green eyes and bright blue eyes. 

In an instant, Sakura felt something warm trail down her cheeks the moment her eyes met with his. Her heart beat slower and slower while her blood felt as if it was magma coursing through her body. Naruto noticed the tear and worriedly approached her, forgetting about his earlier ire at Sakura not humoring him.

“Ne, ne, Sakura-chan?”

Sakura wiped the tear away and gave him a reassured smile while waving her other hand around.

“Ah, it’s nothing. I just got dust in my eyes earlier.”

Naruto looked unimpressed, wanting to know who made his friend cry but the sudden onslaught of a slight breeze caused dust to enter his eyes too. He yelped and furiously wiped at his eyes, wanting to have the foreign object out of his eyes. When that was done, he glared unimpressed at their surroundings.

“Ugh, this is why I hate dust, dattebayo! This always happens to me!”

“En, you should just use your goggles to keep the dust out then, Naruto-kun.”

Naruto pouted again. He perked up though when he realized that there was another person aside from them both. He turned to the person and smiled brightly as he held the larger hand in his smaller ones, swinging it slightly.

“Ne, Sakura-chan, you’ll never guess the identity of my jiji. Heheheh.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah! This is my jiji. He’s the Third Hokage and he’s awesome!” 

Sakura stared at the person and blinked a few times, her frown visible as she tried to put a finger to her earlier reaction. The Third Hokage stared back at her, his eyes warm and gentle, as if looking at his own grandchild. 

“Uh… Hello, Hokage-sama. I’m Haruno Sakura and Naruto’s my friend!”

“Hello, Sakura-chan, I can call you that, can I?”

Sakura’s frown deepened slightly before nodding hesitantly when she saw Naruto nod his head vigorously as if in encouragement.

“I’m the Sandaime, but you may simply call me the same way that Naruto-kun addresses me.” 

A small but gentle smile was etched on the Third Hokage’s face. He looked unassuming, just as if he was a grandfather who could hurt no fly. Regardless, Sakura still had the urge to rip the smile off his face.

“I understand, Sandaime-sama.”

She smiled inwardly in triumph when the smile dimmed slightly. 

* * *

Hiruzen noted that the Haruno child was shy. Very shy indeed as she kept her face covered with her long bangs and refused to address him as ‘jiji’, as Naruto would fondly do. Although he supposed the small frown of disapproval on her face when she first saw them could be attributed to childish jealousy of having their friend’s attention taken away. Naruto certainly made that face throughout the course of this conversation quite a few times when he was ignored. 

“Ne, ne, Sakura-chan, Sakura-chan, why is Fuwa not with you?”

The Haruno child, Sakura - he reminded himself, shifted her gaze towards Naruto and the frown slowly melted away into a gentle gaze.

“Mama said she’ll be taking him to the vet to get shots.”

“What’s a vet?”

“That’s the animal hospital.”

“Oh? Animals also get hospitals?”

“Yea.”

“Woah! But aren’t shots scary? What if Fuwa cries?”

Sakura frowned slightly and tugged at her hair. They were a light pink and if they were hit by the lights from the peeking sun just right, Hiruzen could almost swear he was sent back to the past just a bit. Her green eyes were brighter but sometimes, if the bangs casted shadows over her eyes just a bit, he could almost feel the same gaze that he had feared all those years ago.

“Ehhh, what’s dango?”

“It’s good food.”

“Better than ramen?”

“What’s that?”

“WHAT?!”

“...”

“Ramen is like the yummiest food in the whole world! It’s…”

His face slowly morphed into a curious and appraising one as he watched the two children converse. The name Haruno was uncommon and also common at the same time. There was a whole civilian district where the Haruno merchants were known. However, they rarely had the coloring of pink and green and had favored the less conspicuous coloring of brown and black. The fact that Haruno Sakura was registered as a civilian despite her coloring could only be due to two possibilities. One was her father was from the uncommon Haruno name and had married her civilian mother. Two, she took her coloring from her mother who had a darker peach-colored hair that was closer to orange than pink and was diluted by her father’s coloring.

Out of the two possibilities, he was hoping it leaned more towards the second one. If it was the first one… His eyes slightly darkened in thought.

He was suddenly brought out of his reverie when he felt several tugs on the sleeves of his haori and saw Naruto peering at him with his blue eyes. The other child had moved behind Naruto but was still keeping a safe distance away from him. 

“Ne, jiji, Sakura-chan says she never tasted ramen before. Can you imagine that, dattebayo?!” 

He chuckled and patted Naruto’s head that was full of blonde hair reminiscent of his father’s own slightly untameable hair. 

“Well, if Sakura-chan hasn’t tasted ramen before, maybe we can treat her to one then. What do you say?”

At the words ‘treat’ and ‘ramen’, Naruto’s eyes turned to hearts and his mouth slightly watered while his stomach made a ‘gulu’ sound. 

“Yosh! Sakura-chan, you’re gonna love ramen for sure! Ichiraku ramen is the best, dattebayo!”

The child smiled and poked Naruto’s arms before replying, her voice light and cheery.

“I’m sure dango still tastes best.”

“WHAT?! SAKURA-CHAN!”

The two stuck their tongue out and chased each other in circles as they poked each other, demanding that they accept that their favorite food was the best. Hiruzen slightly relaxed and looked up at the clouds, sighing wistfully. He would be taking a gamble by encouraging Naruto’s friendship to develop with his new friend. He could only hope he would not regret it. 

* * *

“Mama.”

“Sakura. How was your day?”

“It went well. Naruto-kun introduced me to his jiji and treated me to ramen.”

“Oh? How did that go?”

“His jiji was the Sandaime.”

Momoshi stopped to glance at Sakura who was seated on the sofa and reading through one of her lesson scrolls. Her hands slowly caressed the sleeping Fuwa’s fur as she observed Sakura’s expressions.

“I see.”

“Mama.”

“Yes?”

“I don’t know why I wanted to rip his smile off his face.”

Momoshi’s hands stilled and Fuwa groaned in disapproval at the sudden lack of the warmth from her hands. Sakura was still focused on her scroll, her face remaining neutral and concentrated as if she had not just confessed to wanting to maul someone’s face on their first meeting. 

“That’s not surprising.”

She smiled toothily.

“I would want to do the same if I met him too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I look inside myself and see my heart is black  
> I see my red door I must have it painted black  
> Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts  
> It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black
> 
> \- Paint It Black by The Rolling Stones -

**Author's Note:**

> "And when you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you."
> 
> -Friedrich Nietzsche


End file.
